3 Easy Ways to Get Free Drinks

Submitted by amilh on Thu, 2008-01-24 21:20.

You're at a bar, the music is great, the vibe is right, and you're ready to rock. You reach in your pocket to pay for a drink and SNAP, you're out of money!!!! Don't flip out, seriously you look gay when you flip out. If you use any of these tips, you'll get that free drink and continue to get free drinks ALL NIGHT LONG!

1. Get some tits

Mammories are like free money. Seriously get a few of these bad boys and you could get free drinks, golf carts or your favorite eggo waffles (cinnamon rocks).

2. Get a Vagina

This one is a little trickier because people won't immediately know that you have a vagina. Word to the wise, when you're in a bar and a someone comes up to you, whisper in their ear "guess what, I gots me a vagina." Case closed, that beer of choice is yours.

3. Pretend you are an empty beer box

This might look stupid, until you start getting free beer out of it. Start by drinking a case of beer. Don't worry you will totally make up the free beer later. Next, place the empty beer box on your head and walk into a bar. When the bartender sees you, remember NOT to ask for a beer. This will confuse the bartender into thinking you are in fact just an empty box of beer and they will immediately fill it up with NEW beer. Problem solved. You're welcome.